Dead
Name: Jon
Schooling: BHS Class of 2003
Likes: Friends, Being Himself, New People,
Dislikes: Being Called a Pothead, Immaturity
Bio: One sad, misunderstood boy who lived too fully and dreamed too much. Sadly, he was taken by the Scooby Gang and could not be saved by Mr. Bunny and Mr. Squirrel. He perished in a horrible toasting accident.
Name: Matt
Schooling: BHS Class of 2003
Likes: Nintendo, Videogames, Movies, Comics
Dislikes: Mistaken Identities, Getting Molestered, The Afterlife
Bio: Super being extraordinaire from the moon of Planet Sailor, Matt makes it his duty to protect the universe from great harm by transforming into a Sailor Jacobsen! Sadly he was defeated and sent to the Nethernet where he is slowly regaining power.
Name: Mike
Schooling: BHS Class of 2003
Likes: Metroid, Videogames, Nintendo, Spiderman, Megaman
Dislikes: Life
Bio: Twin Brother to Matt, they form the Team Sailor Jacobsen. Plans are slowly forming to overthrow the Nethernet and return to the land of the living for their vengence. If only the accursed Link could be defeated! Then, then ultimate justice would be had!
Name: Adam
Schooling: BHS Class of 2003
Likes: Punk Rock, Guitar, Long Hair, Videogames, Link’s Special Friendship
Dislikes: Death, Missing the English Nonconformists, Stupid Towe– Nevermind
Bio: Adam was torn from his role as guitarist in the band The English Nonconformists, and now must befriend Link in hopes of finding a way home. The Jacobsens must be made to understand before anyone can go anywhere!
Name: Link
Likes: Flying leaps, teeth hugs, affection
Dislikes: Rejection, resistance
Bio: Link has escaped from the Videogame World into the Nethernet to spread his own special breed of tough love. Resistance is futile.
Name: Freakazoid
Age: Pie
Likes: Witty retorts
Dislikes: People who don’t “get him”, Candlejack
Bio: Freakazoid has escaped TVLand to spread his humor in new, non-rerun form.
Name: Evil Chimp
Likes: Evil, soul-stealing
Dislikes: Happiness, all that is good
Bio: Ben’s Pet Monkey became posessed and went on a soul stealing rampage. Luckily, someone managed to banish Evil Chimp to the Nethernet dimension, where he unleashes terror upon the dead.
Name: Old Lady Puppet
Age: Old
Likes: Mischief, Mischief, MISCHIEF!
Dislikes: Er.. goodliness?
Bio: An evil old hag of a hand puppet created to spread mischief! CITY ON FIRE! In case you’re wondering where the inspiration for her came from, you should watch the stage version of Sweeney Todd. There’s a crazy hag who lives near the shop that yells “Mischief!” a lot.
Name: Renee
Schooling: WHS Class of 2002
Likes: Country music, poetry, angst, boys
Bio: Renee survived the nuclear bomb that destroyed Watertown only to later be set on fire by Ben. She was the leader of the Watertonians.
Name: KT
Schooling: WHS Class of 2003
Likes: Annoying Renee, boys, music
Dislikes: Being set on fire, Renee
Bio: KT is Renee’s younger sister. It didn’t take long for Ben to decide to commence with the Watertonian cleansing and end KT’s life.
Name: Sarah
Schooling: WHS Class of 2002
Likes: Things
Dislikes: Stuff
Bio: Another Watertonian. A dead one… She too survived the nuclear blast only to later perish in the flames of Ben.
Name: Heidi/Anti-Bunny
Schooling: WHS Class of 2002
Likes: Killing rabbits
Dislikes: Porn, bunnies, porn bunnies
Bio: Another Watertonian, Anti-Bunny refers to Playboy, but means endless hatred of all rabbitkind. She must carry on her rabbit genocide campaign from the confines of the Nethernet.
Name: Liz
Schooling: WHS Class of 2003
Likes: Good quotes, good times, Thoreau
Dislikes: Sarcasm, sexfiends
Bio: A Watertonian who was one of Alex’s lovers, but let’s not talk of that. She was once a blonde haired fish, but also grew beyond that. Sadly she soon died and now must think on in the Nethernet.
Name: Mikie, Boywhiz, Huzyrdadi, Etc.
Likes: PvP
Dislikes: PvP
Bio: People who came from the land of the now very defunct PvP webcomic Forums. Many random people appear. Many lust for Sonya. Too bad. Forumopolis is the current incarnation of these forums.
Name: Byte Me, Lurking Evil, etc.
Likes: Evil, ActiveWorlds & Stuff
Dislikes: Lag
Bio: Byte Me blew up Watertown and the forums and has gone into hiding. Lurking Evil just wanted to be in the comic, but has disappeared. Only memories remain. ActiveWorlds is a 3d virtual chat program that predates SecondLife.